I want to share what happened today...
While I was in church I heard something that was crushingly dissapointing. The thing that I have wanted to do for ages, that would "progress" me in my ministry and giftings, was given to someone else. The green eyed monster of envy reared it's ugly head.
"I can do the job heaps better..." (no, not exactly humble!!)
"Why does he get the opportunities lately???"
I sulked on the interior, felt anger, felt frustration. WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE MY TURN????
I felt quite negatively for a while, then on the way home, as I moodily stared out of the window, inspiration struck. Maybe I should pray about this!! LOL
So... I prayed. I prayed and asked God to help me respond with grace, fill me with peace and I wanted to trust Him. I prayed that God will help me to get over this dissapointment. I felt better... then I felt even more better... :) God said to me "Aren't you forgetting something?? I told you this, what days ago and you have already forgotten???"
Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do in full measure more than all our desires or thoughts, through the power which is working in us,
"I am able."
I started to get excited. God will do in FULL measure MORE than all I desire and dream of!
Then God said "Why are you putting your faith in a human to fulfill this?"
He is right!! I've been waiting for a person to help bring things to pass, and give me opportunities. I have to stop believing in this person, and start relying on God, having faith in God for this. GOD is able.. not a person. If I believe in this person, I'll be going for a consolation prize... I want what GOD has got in store for me. I want MORE than I have ever desired or thought about. I want GOD's plans for me.
Thankyou God for your grace, and for reminding me of what I already know. Thankyou for showing me that my faith needs to be in you. Thankyou that you will never dissappoint me. I will wait for you, because what you have for me is going to be amazing.
I pray for the person who is going ahead of me to do great things. I pray that you will bless him and annoint him. Give him courage to speak your word. Forgive me for being a sullen, jealous old bat.